Well that
damn sore throat finally turned into a cold and I felt like shit the past
couple of days. I didn’t really feel
like writing today, aside form the cold my awesome boyfriend bought me a 3Ds XL
for anniversary/Christmas gift and all I want to do is play Pokemon X. But for you my lovelies I shall write a brief
survival guide to a cold/ how to get someone to sympathies with you.
Step 1, you just got
the cold:
Once the
cold has come with the gross dripping snot, watery eyes, and hunched over body;
it is time to hunker down in a warm dark corner of the world. In this case your bedroom. If it is a really nasty cold call in sick
from work, if you do this you have to sound really raspy and clogged up. Also if you share a bed with a partner make
them sleep somewhere else, you need them healthy so you can use them as your
nurse slave.
Step 2, gather the essentials
When you
have cleared out your space and time on your calendar to be hunkered down for
the next couple of days, it is time to gather the equipment/medical supplies.
1: warm bed and blankets
2: twp to three boxes of tissues
3: a large paper bag for used tissues
4: large thermal mug full of hot tea and honey.
5: 6 can of chicken noodle soup.
6: TV with a game counsel or cable so you have something to
watch and fall asleep to.
7: get a cat or dog to be your cuddle buddy. If you don’t have a soft furry friend then
a stuffed animal will do.
8: drugs, lots of drugs
Step 3, get your loved one or roommate to become your nurse.
This might
be a bit hard for some people but with the right look and attitude you can get
them to be your errand boy. First you
have to look sicker than you really are.
I know you may feel like shit but sometimes the outward appearance can
fool some people. So you will need to
grease up your hair and dishevel it, put white powder on your face, and dab a
little red blush on your nose. Next wear
old bath robes, long sleeve night shirt with sweat pants and shuffle around (in
slippers) around the house moaning. Try
going into the kitchen and bang up some pots drop cups and utensils. Eventually they will want you out of there
and escort you back to the room and fix you with whatever you need.
Step 4, rest
This may
seem simple, but in today’s society where we need to be connected to everyone
all the time it drains you. So, this may
be hard but turn off the phone, computer, tablet, and whatever else connects to
the internet. If you need to email for
work limit it to 15-20 minutes in the morning and 20-30 in the afternoon. Remember you are trying to be rid of this
cold fast and quick.
It’s ok to lay
in bed and sleep or watch old movies.
The more you sleep and rest the faster the cold will go away. Do not forget to drink lots of fluids. Hot tea is the best since it will help break
down the mucus in your throat and nose.
Dinking flat sprite or 7-up is good as well.
Just
remember the only way to be rid of a cold is to stay in bed with your warm
blankets, and just rest. Between dinking
like a fish and resting you should be rid of your cold fast. Sorry this is a bit wordy but if you made it
this far then give your self a high five.
If you have tips of getting well leave them in the comment section
below. See you Monday for what will
probably be a boring Monday wrap up.
See you on the other side.
No comments:
Post a Comment